To ask my doctor for better drugs today. I kind of confused him. But in the end he said yes. Then I started to have a small panic attack that was barely visible to him but I decided to explain to him anyways they asking for pain medicine specifically narcotics is very emotionally traumatizing for me because i dont want to be labled a junkie. And I swear in that moment, an american doctor was actually compassionate. He told me that I have no other choice but medication right now and that there was no sense in beating myself up. And then he said the words I’ve been waiting to hear all my life: “you are not a drug abuser. You are a young man with a debilitating back problem that isn’t getting better” how fucking rare and awesome is that!!!
This ever happen to you?
Ok so you have something you either really need to go out and do or really want to go out and do. You spend all day(and probably the night before) resting and preparing, but the time comes and you realize you have to cancel. So heres the question: do you ever get this huge burst of doubt and energy after you cancel? Like “im just being a pussy I totally could have made that 50 minute car ride and stood up for 4 hrs”?
The timing of you joining me is a bit off. Im practically swimming in my own fecal matter and bile. So thats pretty attractive. I swear if I knew13 years worth of pain meds was gonna cause this im not sure I would have taken the perscription in the first place. P.s. now really swimming. I swear I own a toilet.
Didnt have a choice really so i got through the whole show. It went really well, everyone was really good.
On my way to a gig I’ve been putting together for the past 3 weeks I’m having one of the most violent IBS attacks ive ever had which is in turn causing my depression to become unhinged
Your thoughts are important to. Tell me them sometime.